I have always prided myself on my reputation.  I have been an awesome role model, a great friend, someone people can trust and feel safe, someone who would be there for anyone who needed someone to just listen.  I guide through actions and use word to aid.  I am non-judgmental and easygoing.  I keep things confidential.

The past 4 years have begun to wear on me.  I still hold these values and always will.  But I have been under constant attack.  I have been falsly accused of many things and rightly accused of others.

I did not have an affair on DC with BW.  DC over reacted we seperated and this began the drama in my life.  Yes it is true BW and I did end up together in the end. This is where things went downhill.  I lost my friends.  Which was funny since they have been accused at one time or another of the same.  I thought they were my friends but I guess they weren't true.

BW was a fiasco.  DC and I eventually got back together for a short stint where we realized we are better off as friends.  I love her dearly but we are not for eachother.  She is like family to me.  At the end of round two trouble came about AA and partner began rumors of me and a coworker.  A coworker who was going throught some very hard times and felt safe with me.  We began a strong friendship that a few people understand, others pass judgment.

Now I have learned that my friendship and conections with people have brought to question my reputation.  People if you have a question talk to me I'll answer.  Don't make assumptions.  I am not a rumor, I am a person.  Keep me out of your drama.  If you need me talk to me I'm here and I will here for people who need someone safe.  Don't try and take me down.  I will protect my reptutation for I pride myself on who I am!

Current Mood: annoyed

"Love is not for me...Love is for people who believe in it"  - to this I say...Love is a smile in your heart!  Love is a hug from your dog!  Love is a word that need to be backed by actions.  Use the word love when you truly mean it overuse will make it meaningless.  Show love.

"The more you know about the past the better your future will be" - True!  History (the past) is memory of the lessons learned and how to move forward. 

"Philosophy is a walk on the slppery rocks, religion is a light in the fog"  - So true

"A dream is a wish your hrart makes" - as long as it's good :-)

"Imagination is the highest kite you can fly" - Reach for the stars

"Walk in front of me and I will not follow - Walk behind me I will not lead - Just walk beside me and be my friend"  - We all need people who will walk beside us.

Current Mood: optimistic

I am currently reading a fantastic book by Paulo Cohelho The Zahir ...I highly recommend it, or any book by this author.

"...absolute freedom does not exist; what does exist is the freedom to chose anything you like and then commit yourself to that decision." - Paulo Coelho The Zahir

"When I had nothing more to lose, I was given everything.  When I ceased to be who I am, I found myself." - Paulo Coelho The Zahir

These two statments have caused me to reflect...In a way freeing something inside.  Awaking parts have slumbered for a time.  I had ceased to exist inside and in the past 10 days with the help of a friend I am finding myself again.

Current Mood: optimistic